Confessing the same sin again

Yes, confess it again, and yes, God forgives it again. Scripture sets no limit on the number of times a believer may come back to God with the same sin, and there is no point at which his patience quietly expires. If you have fallen for the fifth or the fiftieth time, the way back is the same as it was the first time: honest confession, trust in Christ, and turning again.

But a sin that keeps returning is also telling you something. It usually means that confession alone is not enough, and that something about the pattern, the triggers, the secrecy or the lack of help needs to change. There are two quiet errors to avoid here. One is despair, the feeling that God must be tired of you. The other is presumption, the habit of sinning because you know you can confess afterwards. Scripture answers both.

God’s forgiveness does not run out

Peter once asked Jesus how many times he ought to forgive someone who kept wronging him. He offered what seemed a generous number.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not just seven times, but seventy-seven times! — Matthew 18:21-22

Jesus was not setting a new ceiling at seventy-seven. He was saying that forgiveness among his people should not be counted at all. It would be strange to think God asks us to forgive without counting while he himself keeps a tally.

John writes to Christians who, like us, do not want to sin and yet do.

My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate before the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He Himself is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world. — 1 John 2:1-2

The goal is not to sin. But when you do, you are not on your own defending yourself. Christ speaks for you, and his sacrifice is enough for this sin too, even if it is a sin you have committed many times.

Struggling is not the same as not caring

Many people who confess the same sin repeatedly start to wonder whether they are truly Christians at all. If they really loved God, surely they would have stopped. Paul’s honesty about his own struggle is a help here.

For I do not do the good I want to do. Instead, I keep on doing the evil I do not want to do. — Romans 7:19

Christians disagree about how best to read this chapter, but at the very least it shows that inner conflict with sin is something a person who loves God can experience. The fact that you hate what you keep doing is itself a sign of God’s work in you. People who do not care do not grieve. And Paul does not end in despair.

What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord! — Romans 7:24-25

Falling again is not the end of the story

For though a righteous man may fall seven times, he still gets up; but the wicked stumble in bad times. — Proverbs 24:16

The difference between the righteous and the wicked in this proverb is not that one falls and the other does not. It is that one gets up. Getting up again, with God’s help, is what faithfulness often looks like in real life.

Repeated sin calls for a deeper kind of repentance

Confession is agreeing with God about what you did. Repentance includes turning from it. When the same sin keeps returning, it is worth asking God to show you what lies underneath, and then being practical. Some questions help.

When does it happen? Late at night, when you are alone, after a row, when you are exhausted, on payday. Patterns have times and places.

What comes just before it? Sin rarely arrives from nowhere. There is usually a first small step, a certain website, a certain drink, a certain conversation, a certain mood you have learned to feed.

What are you hoping it will give you? Relief, comfort, control, escape, a sense of power. Naming the need does not excuse the sin, but it helps you bring that need to God and find other ways of meeting it.

Who knows? A sin kept entirely secret tends to keep its hold. Telling one trusted Christian changes the dynamic more than almost anything else.

Then act on what you find. Remove access where you can. Change the route, the setting, the timing. Plan in advance what you will do when the pull comes, because God does promise a way through.

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide an escape, so that you can stand up under it. — 1 Corinthians 10:13

The way of escape is often very ordinary: a door you walk through, a phone you put in another room, a friend you call.

A word about presumption

There is a version of repeated confession that is not struggle at all. It is planning to sin, knowing that forgiveness is available afterwards. If you recognise that in yourself, be honest with God about it. Grace is not permission.

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to everyone. It instructs us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live sensible, upright, and godly lives in the present age, — Titus 2:11-12

Grace forgives, and grace also teaches. The same mercy that cleanses you calls you to change.

When a habit has become an addiction

Some repeated sins involve substances or compulsions that have taken on a life of their own. If you cannot stop drinking, using, gambling or viewing pornography despite real effort and real harm, you may need medical and specialist help as well as spiritual help, and seeking it is part of repentance, not a sign that faith has failed. The guides on drunkenness and addiction and lust and pornography go further. If the pattern involves harming yourself, or you have thoughts of ending your life, please contact a crisis line now: 988 in the US and Canada, Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, Lifeline on 13 11 14 in Australia, or https://findahelpline.com elsewhere.

Where Christians differ

Christians agree that believers should fight sin and that God forgives those who confess. They differ on how much victory to expect in this life. Methodist and holiness traditions have taught that God can free a believer from deliberate, wilful sin, and they encourage people to expect real deliverance. Lutheran and Reformed traditions emphasise that the Christian remains both forgiven and still sinful until the end, so the struggle is lifelong. Catholic practice encourages regular sacramental confession, including of lesser sins, as a means of grace for exactly this kind of struggle. All of these traditions would say to you: do not give up, and do not stop coming back.

Keep coming back

God is more committed to your change than you are.

being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. — Philippians 1:6

So confess it again, today, plainly. Ask God to show you the next practical step and take it. Tell one person you trust. And keep turning up at church, among other forgiven sinners who are also learning to get up again.